LEVEL DESING FOR DIMMIES: Mario Bros 1 1

Hey mike, mike here. Ive been studying up my level design prowece, and sudying levels from the most famous games. Why is that you may ask? *Grabs knife* You ask too many questions.... Hehehehe.... Well it's because I want to learn how to make good levels for when I'll get to make my own game in the futere some time. That's right.... Like my big bro always used to say "If a games levels suck butt Ill just go suck a butt" and thats true. Though I would never suck a butt thats disguting and grotey as hell and back. Disgusting like a piece of crap smashed between the toilet seat and the toilet bowl and it explodes against the walls and Jimmy gets detention for that. And 9 hours community servings. And having to mop up the crapstane with a f**ing spunge. But yeah so like. Lets take a look at mario's have to offer.

LESSON 1: JUMP, MAN!

oh for f... Before you ask. NO. I dont kow why my mario is TEAL. Mario is red... NOT TEAL. well, he's teal because im playing on an emulater. Well the first opsticle we see is a Goomba that forces you to jump up and into the block. So yeah. If you ever think tutariels in gmaes drag on and on and on just rememeber that mario does what a ps3 game would do in 10 mintutes in 1 minute. But I will admit. Tose videos in Little Big Plume are funny as f*..... When the old fart talking tells you you should says you should activate a button to kill your self. I dint know you could say that in a video game. I think if jimmy knew that theres a crapstation game where you can fart so hard you kill yourself hed find that funny and maybe reconsinder his hatered.

you cant say thats not the funnyest thing youve ever seen lol. I mean ive heard rumors that they want to add this function to the next big mario game. NINTENDO!! ADD THIS TO THE NEXT BIG MARIO GAME!!!

LESSON 2: THEY DONT CALL IT BOTTOMLESS!

now, as a grate horror puppet on a red trycicle once said, riddle me this. can you see whats wrong here? can you see what valuabe lesson is the game is teaching you here? because in the fabled place where you get to find a mushroom to grow larger. Well. if you dint notice the pit of doom on the right, that mario's yummy mushie dinner will fall into. you're S.O.L. because unlike Little Big Plume, mario does NOT have a kill yourself button. so unless you want mario to nag you all day about his hunger. catch that mushie in your mouth before it meets an untimingly death. well ive heard rumors but its unlikely that they will add a kill yourself button to the next big mario game.

LESSON 2: HIGH GROUND OR THE SIGH GROUND!!!

this is a lesson that all video games teach you, not just ones on the SNES. THE HIGH GROUNE IS THE PLACE TO BE!!! Not because of the livly night life, man, get your head outta the gutter! Its because the higher you are, the higher you soar. So whenever you're on the low ground thinking of wanting to press the kill yourself button. Remember. the higher you are the higher you soar.

LESSON 2: AND NOW A MUSICLE BREAK

what can we learn from mario's mighty song? well fo course. the higher you are the higher you soar. And the game teeches us this with a tall tall flagpole. and if we reech the top of the flag pole... that's right. we get a bonus mario. so if nintendo finally adds a you-know-what to the next big mario game... KEEP PRESSING IT!!!! YOULL NEVER RUN OUT!!!!

I dedicate this "Eddy" to the late 25 pesident of the USA, William McAllister.

Love, mike