Chapter 4
Ants
I found myself in a goraje sale that was full of awesome stuff. There were snes games, nes games, comic books... literally not a crapstation game in sight. they were also selling fireworks and bb guns for dirt. azz. cheap. and i had a ton of money with me, like 45 dollars. the world was my iceberg.
So i start gathering up snes games that look cool, a couple dart guns and targets that i could use to practice, also hoping that somehow I could take these out of the dream whenever I woke up. If I woke up. (I did wake up in the end so I wasn't even worried or scared but i didnt get to keep my dart guns which sucked. dirt. azz.).
I take all this crap up to the guy running the garage sale, who looked kind of like one of the baseball shy guys from yoshis island. I give him a few bucks from my wallet (which was always pretty much full kinda like Mike's) and the guy just laughs and says that's not the kinda money we want around these parts. I say these parts? We're in wisconsin brotha what else would we use. And then I start feeling a itchy sensation around my arms, very slite at first but I soon realize that I'm being walked over by thousands of tiny little ants.
Their not biting me or anything.
But i can somehow feel the indovidual thoughts of each one of them. All theyre wishes and fears. What their names are, what their friends names are, what the name of their god is, when they were born and if their afraid to die or not. The ants fill my eyes and mouth and ears and crawl under my nails and squeeze through my pours and pitter patter along my brain... all I can understand at that point is the collective mind of all the ants.
Rather than feeling like I'm drowning, I feel like im looking into a big stirring witches pot, full of words and sounds and dreams.
I am an ant.
Ticker, ticker, ticker.
We don't live in a ant farm or an anthill whatever those things are called. Rather we live inside ideas. We eat ideas and we are ideas. We were pure value and pure worth, but we still had the form of shiny, real ants.
I could talk to my friends. I wasn't Jimmy anymore. I gathered light and whims for the colony. I helped the nest grow and stay solid.
It was almost a dream inside my dream, because I felt like I had been here my entire life.
Ticker, ticker, ticker.
You know how sometimes you have dreams where you're someone else and you always were?
Ticker, ticker, ticker.
Well... What if you could change who you are to something else and it was always like that? Even in the past and the future?
Ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker,
ticker.
This is all I could think and feel and it made nothing sh##it sense at all. So i decided i was back in my room as myself playing kid klown in crazy chase lol and that was the end of that.
